Adult Obesity In Galveston County, Texas

Paper details
This interesting submission focuses on the social determinant of health (SDOH) in need of attention in
Galveston County. The target population is identified as female adults aged between the ages of 45 and
64, as well as Hawaiian/Pacific islanders. The proposal of two policy alternatives is found and the preferred
policy is identified as community support for physical activity. A brief discussion regarding financial
implications is competent. An engaging discussion describes the nurse as change agent and the reflection
includes the roles of the change agent, how the roles were filled, and what was learned. A separate
reference page is found with the appropriate heading, the use of double-spacing, and alphabetization.
The clear identification of a social determinant of health (SDOH) for Galveston County, a relevant source to
support the identification of the SDOH, data from both state and local resources that support the
description of the SDOH for Galveston, a concise description of the target population, a fully developed
discussion describing the diversity in the community, the identification of specific policy makers – includingtitles and affiliations, a fully developed discussion describing why the policy brief should be brought to the
attention of the identified policy makers, a fully developed discussion describing how the lack of a current
policy affects the community, a discussion describing the ethical implications associated with the lack of a
current policy and the proposed policy, a fully developed discussion describing how the proposed policy will
address the SDOH in Galveston, a persuasive and fully developed discussion that describes the course of
action, the APA References aspect, and the APA Sources aspect are areas of the submission that are
incomplete and in need of additional development.
Please see this essay order to get more details. These areas need correction, other areas should remain
as it is.
Please contact me as needed )
A1. Social Determinant
Approaching Competence
Approaching CompetenceThe description of 1 SDOH within the chosen community that necessitates a
policy change is not well supported with relevant sources. Or the SDOH is not appropriate for the chosen
community.
EVALUATOR COMMENTS: ATTEMPT 1
An interesting statement reveals that people in Galveston county need “less leisure time physical activity”.
However, this is not a social determinant of health (SDOH). Please clarify a social determinant of health for
Galveston – for example – lack of access to physical activity. Once a SDOH is identified for Galveston
County, please provide a relevant source(s) to substantiate the fully developed discussion.
A1a. Data
Not Evident
Not EvidentData from state and local resources are not provided.
EVALUATOR COMMENTS: ATTEMPT 1
A state resource appears to support the statement that people living in Galveston are obese. However, a
SDOH has not yet been identified. Once a SDOH is identified, please provide data from both state and
local resources that support the description developed in the previous aspect.
A2. Target Population
Approaching Competence
Approaching CompetenceThe description of the target population affected by the SDOH does not include 3
characteristics of that population, or it does not address consideration of diversity within the community. Or
the description is not specific to the chosen SDOH.
EVALUATOR COMMENTS: ATTEMPT 1
The target population appears to be defined as female adults aged between the ages of 45 and 64, as well
as Hawaiian/Pacific islanders. It is unclear if Hawaiian/Pacific islanders includes people of all ages and
genders? Additionally, a fully developed discussion describing the diversity in the community is not fully
developed.
A3. Policy Makers
Not Evident
Not EvidentNone of the policy makers who should review the policy brief are identified.
EVALUATOR COMMENTS: ATTEMPT 1
Two groups – The United Board of Health and The Coastal Health & Wellness Governing Board – are
identified as the policy makers who should receive this important policy brief. However, this aspect requires
the specific names, titles, and affiliations of each of the policy makers.
A4. AttentionNot Evident
Not EvidentThe submission does not explain why the SDOH requires the policy makers’ attention.
EVALUATOR COMMENTS: ATTEMPT 1
A promising statement reveals that individual “customers” need encouragement to make lifestyle changes.
However, specific policy makers have not yet been identified. Once they are identified, please provide a
fully developed discussion describing why the policy brief should be brought to the attention of each of the
identified policy makers. For example, please include any information about the specific named policy
makers’ decision-making experience with or demonstrated interest in the identified SDOH.
A4a. Current Policy
Approaching Competence
Approaching CompetenceThe submission discusses the current policy, but it does not accurately discuss
how effective the policy is in addressing critical aspects of the SDOH in the community. Or sources to
support the current policy are not provided. Or if a policy does not exist for the SDOH, the submission does
not discuss the effect this has on the community.
EVALUATOR COMMENTS: ATTEMPT 1
A promising statement reveals the lack of a policy to address leisure time activity in Galveston County. A
fully developed discussion describing how the lack of a current policy affects the community is unclear.
A4b. Ethical Implications
Not Evident
Not EvidentA discussion of the ethical implications of the current policy or absence of an existing policy is
not provided.
EVALUATOR COMMENTS: ATTEMPT 1
A promising statement reveals that the lack of a current policy has ethical implications. However, a
discussion that addresses the ethical implications of the lack of an existing policy is not fully developed.
Please provide a fully developed discussion that describes possible ethical implications associated with the
lack of a current policy that includes a specific ethical principle or the ANA Code of Ethics provision or an
ethical theory.
A5. Demographics Table
B3c. Ethical Implications
Approaching Competence
Approaching CompetenceThe submission does not logically discuss 2 ethical implications of the proposed
policy on the population, or only 1 ethical implication is discussed.
EVALUATOR COMMENTS: ATTEMPT 1
An accurate statement reveals the importance of ethical implications when proposing policy changes.
However, a discussion that addresses the ethical implications of the proposed policy is not fully developed.
Please provide a fully developed discussion that describes possible ethical implications associated with the
proposed policy that includes a specific ethical principle or the ANA Code of Ethics provision or an ethical
theory.
C2. Proposed Policy Summary
Approaching Competence
Approaching CompetenceThe submission summarizes the proposed policy, but the summary does not
describe how the policy will address the SDOH in the community, or the summary is either vague or overly
lengthy.
EVALUATOR COMMENTS: ATTEMPT 1
A concise statement reveals that community based support will decrease obesity in Galveston by 4% in the
year 2023. However, this statement is not supported by a scholarly source(s). Additionally a description of
community-based support is not provided. Please provide a fully developed discussion describing how theproposed policy will address the SDOH in Galveston.
C3. Course of Action
Not Evident
Not EvidentA proposed course of action for policy makers to address the policy change is not provided.
EVALUATOR COMMENTS: ATTEMPT 1
Two groups – The United Board of Health and The Coastal Health & Wellness Governing Board – are again
identified as policy makers who should receive the important policy brief. However, a persuasive and fully
developed discussion that describes the course of action – what is being asked (the policy), and the benefit
of the policy to the community/target population (the persuasive statement) – lacks many details.
E. APA References Section
Approaching Competence
Approaching CompetenceThe reference section is not formatted in APA style or 1 or more of the
references is not credible or relevant for providing background information to policy makers.
EVALUATOR COMMENTS: ATTEMPT 1
A separate reference page is found with the correct heading and the use of double spacing and
alphabetization. However, hanging indents are not used on the Reference page.
F. APA Sources
Approaching Competence
Approaching CompetenceThe submission includes in-text citations and references for content that is
quoted, paraphrased, or summarized but does not demonstrate a consistent application of APA style.
EVALUATOR COMMENTS: ATTEMPT 1
Sources were provided to support the essay topic.
Sources were assessed for attribution (aka correspondence), retrieval (aka location), formatting, and style.
Attribution and retrieval must be satisfied at 100%, and formatting and style cannot exceed the
recommended number of TYPES of errors.
This submission met/did not meet the following areas:
Attribution: Met _ Not met __X_ Author is not correct for the source entitled: “County Health Rankings &
Roadmaps”. Incorrectly formatted in-text citations do not have a corresponding source on the reference list.
For example: (“Galveston- Texas”) and (Health County, 2020). Several paraphrased statements are not
substantiated by in-text citaitons with corresponding sources on the reference list. For example:“The
proposed policy, viz. Community-based social support for physical activity can aid in the reduction of adult
obesity by 4% by the year 2023 by encouraging more adults to lead an active life” and “The percentage of
physically inactive people is 28 percent” and “The estimated costs for providing community-based social
support for physical activity are $200,000”… to name a few.
Retrieval: Met _X_Not met ___
Formatting: Met __X_Not met _The final column of the demographics table should include APA formatted
in-text citations with corresponding sources on the reference list.
Style: Met __X__Not met ____
Please remember that this may not be a complete list of APA deviations for sources. For specific instruction
on citations and reference entries, please click on the link (the square with an upward pointing arrow) to the
right of the “APA Sources” rubric item. Please contact the WGU Writing Center if further assistance is
needed.